WHAT'S YOUR PERSONALITY ORIENTATION?

In my work as a psychologist I have discovered that while we each have unique personalities, there are three orientations into which most personalities can be categorized: physical, emotional and intellectual. Although we each have aspects of these three dimensions, for most us one of these dimensions is primary, and that is what I mean when I speak of a person's "personality orientation."

More specifically, an individual's personality orientation is the aspect of self that she uses most naturally to relate to the world. It is the dimension in which a person is most likely to seek pleasure and also the one she will revert back to during times of stress. Below are some examples of activities and problem solving techniques for individuals with a clearly defined personality orientation.

PHYSICAL: Virtually all of us are born with a physical orientation to life. Our pleasures (and our pains) are disproportionately physical, as our intellectual and emotional selves are much less developed during childhood. Many of us continue along on the physical path into adulthood, while some of us veer off into emotional and intellectual paths during adolescence.

Individuals with a physical orientation are predominantly stimulated by activities that involve the body. On a constructive level this could include exercise, yoga, sports, sex, indulgence in fine foods, and thrill-seeking activities, like skydiving. They are also likely to pursue careers with a strong physical component and tend to feel stilted in jobs that require "sitting at a desk in an office all day." Additionally, they tend to have more developed sense organs and are thus more likely to know the difference in taste between good Scotch and cheap Scotch, or the difference in sound coming from a standard car speaker and a JBL speaker.

Of course, all of the pleasure-seeking activities can be done to excess or in destructive ways, and when physically oriented people struggle with various life problems they often use these physical activities as palliatives or distractions, which can then lead to additional problems (like obesity and alcoholism) and various risky behaviors. In addition, their identities are disproportionately invested in their bodies, so they are much more affected by physical defects (e.g., a scar on the body or hair loss) or the inevitable decline in physical functioning that comes with age.

EMOTIONAL: Those that veer onto the path of emotional orientation after childhood never lose appreciation for the physical part of life, but it's relative importance begins to diminish in favor of attractions in the emotional realm. Emotionally oriented people place tremendous importance on relationships - friendships, romantic relationships and family relationships - as relationships are a tremendous source of strength and provide definition to their identities. To an emotional oriented person, relationships take precedence over any abstract or arbitrary principle about right and wrong. While they may commonly become angry with people in their lives, perhaps even overreacting, they almost never sacrifice a relationship because of pride, which is more of a vice for those that are intellectually oriented.

Emotionally oriented people tend to be more extroverted, or at least more inclined to feel comfortable in social settings. When they are in pain, they are more comforted by talking with someone close than they are going for a jog, drinking a glass of wine, or reading a book. Accordingly, the most difficult life situations for them do not involve the loss of physical skills but the loss of relationships due to death, relocation or estrangement. Emotional oriented people are more likely to marry for love (than for sex, social status or wealth) and are also more likely to put relationship happiness ahead of career achievement, if given the choice.

INTELLECTUAL: The path of intellectual orientation is traveled by those for whom mental pursuits are more highly valued than relationships and the pleasures of the physical realm. They would rather be engaged on a computer in some capacity than on a bicycle or out at a romantic dinner. Socialization for them is simply a means to an end (either in the service of their careers or some other political goal), not something to be enjoyed for its own sake.

Though many intellectually oriented people wind up in careers as academics and professional vocations, the truth is they are likely to be successful in a wide range of occupations, many of which may not require advanced education. Regarding relationships, intellectually oriented people are more likely to marry for reasons other than love (e.g., for social status or wealth, or, because getting married is "what you do") and put career goals ahead of relationship happiness if forced to choose.

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Proportions & Balance

Earlier I noted that while we all have physical, emotional and intellectual dimensions, for most of us one of these dimensions is primary, another secondary and another tertiary. Two people, however, can have similar rankings of these dimensions (e.g., 1- intellectual; 2- physical; and 3- emotional) but have them in different proportions. For instance the orientation proportions of "Steve" may be 37% intellectually oriented; 33% physically oriented; and 30% emotionally oriented, but "Joe" might be 60% intellectually oriented; 25% physically oriented; and 15% emotionally oriented. While we might consider both "Steve" and "Joe" to be intellectually oriented, they will appear very different to most people. "Steve" will present to most people as a smart but balanced guy, perhaps in the mold of the legendary Duke basketball coach, Mike Krzyzewski, while "Joe" might appear to most people as a sci-fi bookworm in the mold of the character "Sheldon" on The Big Bang Theory.

From a clinical perspective, understanding a patient's personality orientation is very important when it comes to recommending treatment options. Though I will discuss this more in a future article, I believe it is important to create a treatment plan centered around a person's personality orientation. For instance, an intellectually oriented person will likely not respond well to interventions for depression or anxiety that involve exercise or joining a social club, but she might respond to meditation (i.e., the temporary freeing of the mind from thought) or an intellectually stimulating project. Similarly, an emotionally oriented person is likely to respond more to a support group than a self-help book.

John G. Cottone, PhD, is a licensed psychologist in private practice and the author of "Who Are You? Essential Questions for Hitchhikers on the Road of Truth."